Kid's books, writing, illustration and art and gnomes...
Tomte and Flora had a lovely day yesterday. Edie helped them get ready then they went and spoke about our book to the Samford CWA. The ladies were kind and gave them lunch. Tomte really enjoyed the fish sandwiches and Flora really liked the chocolate slice. I didn’t get anything because I was at school but Flora has promised to make the jellied tongue recipe from the CWA Cookbook- I hope she’s joking.
x Sam
Hi Sam here.
I’d like to say Happy New Year. NOT! I have to go back to school in a week and even worse, Darling and Tomte are both sick. I was writing my name on all my new school books when I heard the most awful noises. It was Darling the cat, and Tomte, our gnome, and they were both going nuts! Tomte was jumping on the couch like an Olympic gymnast and Darling was doing laps around the lounge room. Suddenly THEY TURNED GREEN and spewed waves of sick on the rug. This is really gross but Tomte was making terrible smells in between vomiting.
When I spied the giant chocolate bar I got for Christmas I realised what had happened.
It was under the piano and all that was left were bits of wrapper. Tomte and Darling had eaten the whole thing for breakfast-even the foil and some of the cardboard. I didn’t know what to do first- clean up the spew or open a window, so I just screamed for Mum -FLORA!!!
Flora came running and when she stopped screaming we gave them a drink of water and rang the Poisons Hotline. Chocolate is poisonous for cats and too much is bad for gnomes. We did the only thing we could – we took them both to the vet. The vet says chocolate can cause vomiting, diarrhoea and hyperactivity in cats. It does the same thing for gnomes- fortunately it was milk chocolate because dark chocolate can kill them!
Anyway Tomte was so sick he didn’t even freeze in front of the vet. Darling just lay on her side. I don’t really want to tell you what happened at the vet, except it involved rubber gloves, bottoms and needles. I am worried sick!
1 Hour Later
The vet just rang to say they are both recovering. They have done some giant chocolate spews and lots of foil has come out both ends of them plus some gold cardboard. Flora looked relieved but grim and told me to “NEVER EVER EVER” leave chocolate hidden under my bed. I agreed because Flora was holding her cheque book and said it was the most expensive chocolate bar ever. She didn’t even laugh when I said we should buy a brown rug for the lounge room.
;(
X Sam -
PS. I couldn’t get Tomte to tell me how to find a gnome doctor and I didn’t have any oak bark to cure him. (See True Book of Gnomes page 69 – for poison cures.)
Hi!! Sam, the boy I live with, sazs we r in cyberspace agen? I thort we were watching the telly but sam says, its the computer.But where’s all; the gud stuff about gnoems I asked? sam is not very pashient becaws i type slowly and English is hard for us with the speling and stuff. He says He will take ova.
Hi. sam here. I live with four gnomes now and they often hang around my computer because they think its like television. Tomte said, ” Where’s the real info about gnomes? And then Binky, his brother said, ” Yeah and where’s some recipies?” (because gnomes are always hungry.) Then Gneville, whose just moved into the daisy garden said , ” Where’s all the gardening tips?” and Hedgewick, whose the youngest said,” I think you’d better start a blog sam, to tell people all about us.”
I was surprised. Gnomes don’t like technology, they’re not good around toasters or vacuum cleaners or computers. Only last week Binky was eating a muffin near my keyboard. I’m not sure what happened but now I can’t get a capital s no matter how hard I try. Watch this : seven super slippery seal said sally my sister sang songs from sunday until september. see not a big s in sight! Binky says it wasn’t a muffin it was a weetbix and he may have dribbled a bit of weetbix spit onto the keyboard. seriously! stay away from my computer I said- I need it for school and talking to my friends but then Hedgewick said ,”People love gnomes, they want to know all about us. “What about gnomenappers,” I asked. “People are always nicking gnomes”. “Hello!” said Tomte , ” we want to tell biggies ( that’s what gnomes called humans) how to stop us being gnomenapped. ” And other important stuff, “said Binky, ” we could swap recipes:)” He had a point, gnomes are terrific cooks. But you can’t turn on the computer , “I said. “You can’t type, you won’t even talk on the telephone.” Then they all fell over laughing and rolling about the desk!!7-817? 6!1628!6,!3;,39$,31895,$95$,9853$,2@@&4, ”Get off the keyboard!” ” We’re not doing it silly chicken,” said Tomte. You’re doing it for us!
” But I haven’t got time, ” I said. ” I’ve got homework and sport and Flora (she’s my mum) is always getting mad at me because I spend so much time on the computer.” I’m not sure what happened after that. Hedge wick started to stare into my eyes so I shut them immediately . I know when a gnomes is doing magic. But then I smelled a strange smell like cake cooking and Tomte started whispering something and the next thing I know ,here I am typing like a lunatic and I seem to have written a blog. Better go -I can hear Flora coming.
X sam
Starz and Moons ! Sam, the boy I live with, sazs we r in cyberspace?1 Whats that mean :0
Flora, Sam’s mum says intraduce yourself and sam sez heed beta take ova beecaws my spelling is unuwsewal.
Hi Sam here- quick explanation- Tomte is our house gnome. He came to live with us after he was kidnapped and we rescued him. He’s terrible at technology and it takes him hours to type a sentence. Flora is my mum and she says I should just write what Tomte tells me because he finds English hard to write. Yes Sir! So here’s Tomte and this is what he wants to say
? Hello it’s Tomte here. Is anybody there? I am a gnome and I live with a family in Brisbane. There are five of us- me- Tomte
Sam- 12, {Petal- his little sister, Flora- the mum, Dad- the dad. Alby,Sam’s grandad- who’s ace and speaks gnome and darling the cat. I have lots of brothers and sisters too but I’ll tell you about them later. Lots of stuff has a happened to us lately and you can read all bout it on this thing Sam calls a blog. Sounds kinda muddy to me. Haaa Haa.)
If u want to know EVERYTHING about gnomes it’s in a book called The True Book of Gnomes.
So about me 
I am just going for a snack. Back soon xxxXXXXoooo
Tomte.
